he second reason I recommend this book so often is that it is very honest; Reilly is transparent about her own process so you will see yourself in her own struggles and triumphs.
The third reason is that “It Takes One to Tango” emphasises personal accountability. My clients often lament that they want to work on their marriage, but their partner won’t come to couples counselling. The question is whether your relationship can be saved when you are the only one working on it - and maybe the only one who thinks something is wrong.
A common misconception about couples counselling is that I will be focussed on fixing your partner. Sometimes a partner will read to me from their favourite relationships book, and quote how their partner should be changing. “He should be doing this! See!” No, no, what actually happens is that each partner will work on themselves! So, Reilly’s book will help you work on yourself and your own attitudes and behaviours and this, in turn, will benefit your relationship. Whether or not you are in Couples Counselling.
Ellyn Bader, Director of The Couples Institute, says,